We’re back! Thanks for your patience while my husband and I practiced the art of “parenting in new places,” also known as “going on vacation.” I hope you found your own ways to connect with the Torah portions I missed and bring them to your family table!
As someone who loves to study Talmud, I’ll never forget a talk I watched by R. Benay Lappe, in which she used the powerful metaphor of donkey stories. If a donkey read Talmud, she said, it would notice all the donkey stories. “Look!” it would say, over and over again, “that’s me! That’s my story!” Similarly, she argued, we look for ourselves in the text and we gravitate to the stories that seem to speak to us directly and personally.
I’m not sure that parashat Balak feels like the Torah portion that speaks to me personally, but it definitely is a donkey story! In the story, Balak, the king of Moab, asks Balaam to come and curse the people. Balaam hesitates, but eventually goes; on the way, his path is blocked by a divine messenger. The donkey sees the messenger, but Balaam does not. He beats the donkey, trying to get it to move, but it refuses. Eventually, the donkey speaks to Balaam, and he realizes what is happening. He goes to Moab, but rather than cursing the Israelites, he blesses them three times, culminating in a blessing that is often quoted (and sung) today:
מַה־טֹּ֥בוּ אֹהָלֶ֖יךָ יַעֲקֹ֑ב מִשְׁכְּנֹתֶ֖יךָ יִשְׂרָאֵֽל
How goodly are your tents, O Jacob,
Your dwellings, O Israel!
This is definitely a story that is fun to tell to young children; after all, it centers on a talking donkey! And it’s a surprising twist in the story that the donkey understands what is going on better than Balaam does. As you discuss Balaam’s (mis)adventures, consider asking your children about animals, especially if you have pets in your home. Do animals ever notice things that we humans miss? If animals could talk, what do you think they would tell us?
Or, you could take it in a different direction, and ask them why they think Balaam couldn’t see the messenger in the road, even though the donkey could. The truth is, I find aspects of this parasha a bit puzzling. In Num. 22:20, God seems to tell Balaam that he can go with the Moabites, but when he does so in verse 22, God is angry. Rashi suggests that this is because when Balaam goes, he plans to curse the people. The text is never explicit on this point, but on Rashi’s reading, it would suggest that Balaam only hears what he wants to hear: God gives him permission to go, but only if he will say what God tells him to say. Balaam chooses to hear only the first part - the permission - instead of what he needs to do when he gets there. Similarly, on the road, Balaam seems to have selective sight, seeing (or failing to see) only what he wants to see. For older kids (and grown ups!), this parasha gives us an opportunity to reflect on our own confirmation bias and how we tend to notice to the things that we either want or expect and to ignore the things that we don’t. How might we get better at seeing the fuller picture? Who in your life acts like the donkey, and helps you see the things you might otherwise overlook, both good and bad?
With all these donkey stories, I couldn’t resist looking up what donkeys eat to inspire my weekly recipe. I won’t suggest that you put straw or hay on your table, but it turns out that donkeys love apples and carrots, which immediately put me in mind of this amazing breakfast loaf from Deb Perelman of Smitten Kitchen. Honestly, I’ve been looking for a good excuse to make this one again, because while my children are partial to zucchini bread and everything chocolate, I’ve always been partial to a good carrot cake. Over time, however, I’ve found myself less fond of overly sweet treats, and this loaf hits the right balance. It is completely pareve, and goes perfectly with a nice cup of coffee for a delicious but not-overly-indulgent Shabbes morning breakfast. (I’m partial to making quick breads and muffins for Shabbat morning, as a special treat to start off the day). Looking for dessert? Whip up a quick cream cheese frosting to push this more firmly into cake territory. Enjoy!
Apple Cider Carrot Loaf
Recipe from Smitten Kitchen
Ingredients
2 1/3 cups (290 grams) all-purpose flour
3/4 teaspoon (5 grams) table or fine sea salt
2 teaspoons (10 grams) baking powder
1 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 cup (120 ml) olive oil
3/4 cup (145 grams) dark brown sugar
2 large eggs
1 cup cider (235 ml)
1 teaspoon (5 ml) vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups packed coarsely grated carrots whole carrots. Note: this will be about 2-3 large/thick carrots, or around 255 grams. The carrots meld into the cake much more nicely if you grate them yourself, rather than buying pre-grated.
Olive oil or nonstick cooking spray for baking pan
Optional cream cheese frosting/schmear: 4 oz cream cheese + 2 tbl softened butter + 1/2 tsp vanilla extract + 6 tbl powdered sugar. I have also just sweetened a little cream cheese with maple syrup and spread it on this loaf, when I’m having to for breakfast rather than dessert but am still in the mood for some decadence.
Instructions
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Coat a 9×5-inch loaf pan with olive oil or a nonstick cooking spray. Note: this loaf will fill the whole pan, so if your pan is smaller, bake some off as muffins. If you’re not sure, consider putting a foil-lined baking pan underneath it to catch any drips.
In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, salt, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves. In a medium bowl, whisk together olive oil, brown sugar, eggs, cider and vanilla. Stir the grated carrots into wet ingredients until evenly coated, then stir the wet ingredients into the dry one just until full incorporated.
Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 60 to 70 minutes, until a skewer inserted into the center comes out batter-free. Let cool in loaf pan for 20 to 30 minutes, then remove from pan and cool the rest of the way on a rack. Loaf should keep at room temperature for a few days, and longer in the fridge.
If desired, mix together the frosting or just sweeten a little cream cheese with maple syrup and spread liberally on individual slices.